As I am sure some of you out there reading my entries wonder about the numbers I place in the titles, I have decided to restate my goals. Once I have completed all goals, my life will be perfect in all ways. This is what I am working toward at all times.

1.) My current weight is 127 lbs. and I must reduce it to 110 for it to be acceptable.

2.) The crowding in my teeth must be corrected.

3.) COMPLETED!!!

4.) COMPLETED!!!

5.) While I have already found the perfect male companion, I must also find the perfect female companion who is pleasing in her physical, mental and spiritual states, just like my male. This will be the hardest of the goals I have set for myself. How can one hope to find two soulmates in one lifetime? I will find out.

6.) Once my body is correctly rearranged to my liking, I will need a new set of clothing and jewelry to draw attention to my hard work wherever I go.

7.) At all times I require more pornography (especially hentai) and video games for enjoyment purposes while I am not studying. These will need to be acquired.

8.) I must work hard to attain more money, for while it does not buy happiness, it does help to facilitate the coming about of it.

9.) My dorm room is very drab and boring and decoration is in order for next semester. Joy in the home is most important!

10.) I must begin saving money for the perfect home (complete with DDR machine and hot tub) for myself, my male and my female.

Now, granted, my life is wonderful. I am not complaining, even a small bit. I have everything I need to be extremely happy at all times. Even when things are going badly in some way, I am not sad. I know there are many who love me, my male, my family, and to a lesser extent my friends. I know that I have more than average intelligence and I am very greatful. I know that my life will continue to be wonderful as long as I work hard and continue to be thankful for what I have. In summary, this list is just a few things that I would like to work on. They are not important to my happiness, simply things that I could slightly improve.

I hope that helps make sense of things for those who are too lazy to read all my entries.

I am pleased by the results of the Calculus test. I knew all the answers and hope for at least a 95 percent allowing for a minor error on my part. I am unhappy that I had to skip my recitation to sleep, however, for now I am left defenseless on my Physics homework. The Calculus test was more important, so I am not displeased. I think things worked out the best that they could given the circumstances. I can see the 4.0 within reach. I believe I will be able to keep my A's. This is a good thing.

I have a test today in Calculus. I couldn't sleep last night. I need to go to my Physics recitation because I don't understand the material, but if I don't stay here in the dorm and get the extra two hours of sleep I will die...literally. I am so tired. I don't understand what was wrong yesterday...maybe the candy...maybe all the sex before bed...I don't know. Something kept me up. Maybe it was just me being worried about the test and then forcing myself to stay awake and think about it unknowingly. Whatever happened, I am in trouble. I have an extreme pain in my upper torso. It feels like someone is cutting into my heart with a sword. This is a product of the lack of sleep. I must sleep more. I must do well on my test if I have any hope of keeping my 4.0, a 93 percent at least to get my grade back up to an A from the high A- that it is. It will be tough on so little sleep, but things are meant to happen the way that they do, so I am not angry. There is nothing to be done now but go to sleep and prepare. I thought I could go to recitation, but when I sat down here at this computer and felt the tight stabbing pain in my chest from no sleep, I knew I couldn't. I must away to my nap now.

Oh! Also I shaved all the hair from my pubic region. This went over reasonably well with my male, but he has decided he prefers a few hairs to none. I agree, but I wanted to try it out. Anyway, just thought I would throw that in. Now, to the nap! *raises hand in the air like a super hero* AWAY!!

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I come into my dorm after wishing my male well as he heads to class with the intention of studying for my upcoming Calculus test and instead I find myself once again investigating xanga for more females to inspect. I am displeased with myself. If only I wasn't so hell bent on the idea of having myself a female and a male, like salt and pepper shakers, then perhaps I would be doing my homework right now. I am foolish.

More to come. I must study...now...okay, now...wait...okay, now.

I know the semester is almost over, but it seems like there is so much work to be done. I worry that I will not make it out of this semester without a couple A-'s. This irritates me. I missed out on a 4.0 in high school because I ran off the road in driver's ed. and recieved one half semester A-. I had a 3.9993. I was very sad. I wanted to finish my freshman year at college with a 4.0 to make up for my failure in high school, and I did so last semester, but this one is a little harder. I know I will not get any B's, but still. I just wanted to make it until the end. Sophomore year, I don't mind if I get a couple A-'s. I know things will get super hard. Freshman year is just general stuff, however, and I wanted so much to own all my n00b classes. Instead, Physics and Economics are owning me. I may get an A- in both...which would make me very sad. I suppose I should not throw out my chickens before they hatch, but I have very little hope. At least both Physics and Economics have non-cumulative finals. This is good news for me.

Overall, I am just feeling a little overwhelmed by my classes with these last three weeks to go. I am slightly frightened. We will see what happens and perhaps it will turn out that I worried for nothing, but only time will tell. An unbearable wait indeed.

I feel that goal number five will be very, very hard. My male and I were talking about it and we decided that if a female cannot be found now in college that we must find another plan. Our plan is to get rich. I, being a Chemical Engineering major, and he with his Computer Science, will bring in tons of money. Then, with this money, we will buy a large house which requires a maid. We will then find a beautiful maid who is interested in having sex with both of us. Now, we cannot hire the maid for the sex. That would be illegal. Instead, we will pay her a huge amount of money, say $100,000 a year to "clean our house" but her real duties will include much more. I believe it will be easy to find a relatively attractive female who we could tame into such a position. Eventually she would not be our maid anymore, but instead our live-in mutual girlfriend. Considering we are nice, loving people paying $100,000 a year, I see no reason for someone to become angry over this kind of proposition. I wonder if it would work. It is interesting to consider, though.

My male and I were blessed by the leaving of his roommate and we had enough time to watch both hentai. Both were disappointing to say the least. "One: True Stories" had way too much story and not enough sex. While the sex was really good, you would have to skip through all the dialogue that was poorly translated anyway to get to it. I give it a 4 out of 10. The other, "Samurai XXX", was poorly animated, had lame sex scenes, and the dialogue was unbearable. I wish you could turn on Japanese WITHOUT subtitles because they were a complete turn-off and confused the heck out of me sometimes, especially when the damn girl ninja put some flowers in her vagina and the guy just did her in the butt but did not remove the flowers. Retarded. Anyway, goal number seven was a failure yesterday and I spent a lot on those stupid hentai. Damnit! I am displeased.

On a better note, my male and I had sex anyway, even with the foolishness of the hentai. He tried again to use my other hole, but it was too tight and it hurt a bit so we resorted to the normal hole for the penis and the fingers in the other. As unlikely as it sounds, it feels incredible and we both came in like twenty seconds. Because we used lube for my ass, we decided to take a shower. He felt bad about his quick climax and continued to pleasure me in the shower and more once we got out. It was good. I was pleased. I am sure he loves me with all of his heart. He cries sometimes when he says things or when I say things to him, but in a happy way, and of course this makes me cry in the same happy way. I suppose we are both very emotional, but I think also that it is because we both know that the other means what he/she says. I will be very pleased to be his wife and if he willed it I would quit college and abandon my 4.0 to be his housewife for the rest of my life. Chemical Engineering, in fact nothing, is as important to me as he is. I love him more than everything...put together.

I had a dream. My dreams are very hard to distinguish from reality because of the way they make me feel. I do not know if I am awake or asleep because everything is so detailed and easily believable to my sleeping mind. In this dream, my male and I had lots of hardcore sex. Later in the dream, after a bunch of weird dream stuff happened (monsters, random school events, government stepping in on the monsters, me being in the circus, whatever, you know the drill with dreams) I found out that I was pregnant. This is where the dream got nasty. It was so real and I knew I wasn't mature enough for a child and the people kept telling me that just being on birth control wasn't enough and I had to have forgotten some, even though I knew I hadn't. Everyone was making fun of me and telling me how careless I was since I hadn't at the same time used a condom and how I must have missed so many pills and how I was an idiot and I would have to quit school and give up my child and everything. I felt in the dream that I wanted the child so much, because you should never give up a child because of what that does to them when they find out that they are adopted. I knew my male would be with me to take care of it, and I knew that it was my responsibility, even if I wasn't ready. About the time that I was being taken to get an abortion against my will, I woke up with sweat on my brow and my male staring at me with worry on his face. It was an awful dream. I know that I will not have a child until I am ready, but the dream was so real. It makes me worry about what would happen if I really did ever miss a pill. I am still in a bad mood because of it.

More to come. I must away to class.

Let us begin.

As for goal number one...I didn't do too well this weekend because my parents want to take me out and treat me, so I indulged myself in many fine food enjoyments. I still lost two pounds overall. Normal. I am pleased by this loss of weight and it accomplishes goal number four, which is for me to think more of myself physically. I feel better about myself already and I know that I will look even better when I have accomplished goal number one. I continue working toward goal number one this week, as I am back at college and away from the temptations of the food my mother and father subject me to.

Goal number three is a funny goal. I realize now that the dry skin I have on my arms is simply a product of wearing short sleeves in the winter like the badass I am. It is leaving me now that the cold no longer bites at my exposed arms. I will have to utilize my skin lotion next winter or not wear short sleeve shirts only in the thirty degree weather. I suppose you could say that I accomplished this goal...but I suppose it simple accomplished itself.

I bought two hentai today! Quite a splurg on that one...64 of my 69 newfound dollars. I still have not watched them for my male and I are once again beset by his foolish roommate, but I will in time and I will post my findings. I am sure they will be enjoyable...they better be. *angry squint*

Construction work continues to kick my ass. Because I worked muscles I don't normally work, I have broken them down. They hurt tremendously. It hurts to walk, to get up and down, to move my legs in any way, and to sit here right now. I am in constant pain. I will have to leave early for classes so that I am not late because of my extremely slow and painful walking. I am not angry, however. I am pleased that I will gain muscle in my legs, ass, back, shoulders and hands, because all of them are in pain. It is a good, growth related pain that should not be scorned. Also, it is from helping my parents and that is to be respected. Again, overall, I am pleased greatly.

I went home for the weekend after my little failure with the female to sulk in my room with my male and eat at this great German winery with my parents, grandparents and some other random relatives. The winery was great, good food and such, very filling...ruined my diet though. One day doesn't really matter in a diet, so it's okay, but I eat way too much. On the other hand, I lost SIX pounds!! In a single week on just eating less that is great...but a little unhealthy. I will have to eat a wee bit more next week. Anyway, a good night with good food and good family was had by all. My male wasn't quite as happy as there were bugs everywhere and he is slightly unhappy around the harmless little things. I comforted him.

Today was hardcore. I knew my parents wanted help in building their apartment buildings. They do almost all the building themselves and they are getting old and need the help of the young. We laid tile today on the floors. I don't mean vinyl composite, this is the hardcore ceramic stuff. We had to smack mortar onto the floor and then lay tiles that weighed four pounds a piece (not much when you pick one up, but when you pick four or five up at a time over and over they get heavy). My mother's knees got very sore and her back of course, too, from all the mortar smearing. I was bending down over and over placing tile behind her, so my back and my ass are very sore, along with my fingertips, which are unused to the punishment of rubbing across the rough surface of the backs of the tile that stick in the mortar. We worked for 5.75 hours, earning me a total of 69 dollars (Ha! 69!) and, of course, the pain in my body. Overall, I am pleased, however, because I was able to subtract from my mother's pain and help them along on the things that are paying my damned tuition. I am proud.

I must hurry to a birthday party now, so I will finish the rest of my news and comments later.