Her face was beautiful, so full of excessive beauty.  I could
almost imagine her lips against mine.  Why does the world torment
me so with these creatures of pure perfection, just out of reach? 
Oh, to have a female to enjoy!

It is likely that she would be unhappy with me.  There are so few
who would be able to become a part of my life in the way that I want
them to.  My male wishes to allow me dates with females to get
them used to me and trusting before I tell them the truth, but I find
this to be too close to a lie for me...  Misleading people is not
what I am want to do.  I only wish to bring joy and pleasure into
others' lives by whatever means I can.

Back to her, so perfect in the face, like a computer generated
beauty.  Not quite asian, but close in looks.  Her hair was
long and straight.  Reading her posts was delightful, so
passionate was she about things.  She mentioned anime also. 
She would be very close to my idea of perfection, were I to ever be
able to speak to her in person.  She will not allow such things, I
am sure, if she notices my profile.  I would be instantly blocked
for my love of all things sexual and my expression of this love. 
I should delete all my thoughts.  They are so strange that no one
but me can enjoy them.  Not even my male is allowed to see
them.  They are private.

I am frightened.  Would she give me a chance?  Perhaps once
my goals are completed and I am truly beautiful and perfect as I hope
to be, then I would be worthy of her, for I am not now, as I am not for
my male, but he accepts me anyhow.  So perfect and wonderful.

I want to feel her lips on mine.  I want to hold her agianst
me.  I want to run my fingers through her hair.  I want to
make her smile and laugh and express her feelings.  I want to know
what she thinks, what she wants, what she is working toward. 
Perhaps I will get the chance, but I doubt it...

The diet is going well.  I can feel the hunger inside my stomach, meaning that my body wishes for more, but does not get it and must use up all that fat I am carrying around my hips.  I feel the lightheadedness associated with the lack of sugar in one's body.  This is good.  After two months my first goal should be complete and I can move on to another.  Very pleasing indeed.

I am slightly irritated by college at the moment.  Such a short time left and I am glad for the coming of summer.  I will not miss my labs...or that whore of an intangible concept physics.  That bitch, she steals my evenings and DDR time so often!  However, while the classwork is finished soon, so the true torment begins.  My male and I must part ways from Columbia and travel to our separate homes... We are sad.  If only we weren't two hours apart, we could simply continue as normal and spend almost twenty hours a day with each other.  Unfortuantely, we are both going to need to work and earn money for future things like a home and a DDR machine.  This is unnavoidable.  We will see each other, but I fear that there will be anger from my parents come time for the payment of the phone bill because of this summer separation.  Again, unnavoidable.  Perhaps it is good that we continue to lack another female, for that would give me another to pine away for as I lay about at my home and sadly make sandwiches at the local Subway.  Oh, the trials of my existence.

Perhaps I should not complain so.  Things go well for me at all times.  If only I didn't have an A- in physics, I would continue my 4.0 this semester.  One test left to redeem myself.  My family is loving and good.  I have a running car and a nice place to live.  I am not poor, except perhaps a bit because I buy too much hentai ($29.99 a pop, damn it!), but that is not money wasted.  Of course, the best part is that I have found the perfect male creature and he is mine for all time.  My life is wonderful and I should not be so whiny like a foolish little emo child.  Pardon my short lapse in correct brain functioning.

Indeed the rest of the hentai was nice.  Such enjoyable sexual
activities!  The foolish roommate made an exit and I immediately
snatched my oppurtunity to enjoy the rest of the story.  I suggest
it to those who can take a small amount of strange activity in a
hentai, but not too much.  Very good indeed.

I am pleased by the hentai I purchased today.  Called "Stainless
Night", it is very enjoyable.  Unfortunately, I was only able to
complete one half of it before my males foolish roommate returned, the
corrupter of all pleasurable situations.  Of course my male was
dissappointed, but not nearly as much as I was.  My favorite
situations in hentai involve females who are...interestingly endowed
inserting themselves into other females, and the roommate of my male
interrupted on such situation.  He will die someday, like all of
us, but I will be content, rather than sorrowful.  I will finish
this enjoyment at a later time.

My male also bought some video games, as he suggested he would. 
He was displeased with himself for trading in "Tenchu: Wrath of Heaven"
at one time and replaced his copy.  He also, being the perfect
creature that he is, bought me a copy of "Metal Gear Solid 3". 
This pleases me greatly.

Goal number seven has been satisfied by these events!  For now I
require no more hentai or video games for a few days.  This is
good and has been a good day for my male and I.  We continue to
wish for a female to play with.  I must work harder on finding
one, for he is far too shy.  Soon.

I have created such a nice look for my page!  The angel and her
sword and the beautiful but ferocious cat woman represent all of my
favorite things from life!  Also, the angel shares my male's
wonderful eyes!  I hope the colors are pleasing to others' eyes,
for I enjoy them, and of course the images as well!

Post comments if it so fits you.

I have been thinking about what this perfect female must be for me to accept her as my second mate and allow my male to enjoy her also.  I have come up with a short list of requirements:

1.)  She must be asian, for that is what I am not and what I wish to be.

2.)  Her face must look very close to a computer generated image of a person, rather than a real person, so that I can easily imagine her body shiny and smooth in one of my hentai.

3.)  Her hair must be longer than one foot or at least touch her shoulders so that I might enjoy running my fingers through it and braiding it.  My male also wishes for this, for he enjoys the pleasure it causes me when he does it and would obviously want this feeling to be passed on to our new female.

4.)  She must be less than a size 8, for that is all I will tolerate and I will say no more.

5.)  She must have sqeezable breasts, ready for my touch and my male's touch at the same time.

6.)  She must enjoy one of the following:  video games, hentai, anime, or DDR.  Without one of these, she will be too far removed from the lifestyle my male and I already lead.

7.)  She must have smooth skin and no acne on her body.  A small amount on the face is acceptable because it is simply something that happens to most people.  Just because I never had any is no reason to discriminate.

8.)  She must be open to more females at any time.  Should she have a girlfriend, that would be the icing on the cake.

9.)  She must be kind, for my male and I are as well and wish for no anger to enter our relationships.

These are the things I require.  Should someone reading this notice that they match at least five out of the ten, please post and I will decide if I want to send you my e-mail.  I am very lenient, even though it sounds as if I am very set on these things.  These are simply my greatest hopes.  Many people fit into my category of perfection, for it is wide and far-reaching!  Please feel free to post!

Two nights ago is something I must record, for it was far to enjoyable not to post for others to enjoy.  My male and I enjoyed the pleasures of each others' flesh for three and one half hours that night.  We neither tired nor withered nor found ourselves dry.  So many positions and activities!  So much stimulation and togetherness!  He is very well endowed with the power to please and I enjoy so much when he is completely one with me, along with his hand at my sweet spot.  I barely last a minute without release!  We engaged in oral and hand pleasures as well.  I do so enjoy holding it and stroking it and placing it in my mouth!  I find that I love the most when I am behind him and holding on to it, as if I am a man with mine inside him!  Perhaps I should invest in one of my own and wear it for him.  I will look into this.

Another important occurence was my final courage with him.  I have told him everything there is to know of myself, except for one thing.  I want him to try both openings!  He agreed and we will go tonight and purchase that which allows such interactions, perhaps the flavored kind.  I also like to put my fingers inside him.  He let me try and he does so enjoy it!  I allowed him last night to place himself inside me while inserting his finger into my tight little ass.  It felt so strange for the first time!  I enjoy it!  Then, after getting enough moisture on it, he tried to fit it into my ass, but I am too tight... That is why we go to purcahse the lube.  I am sure this will help!  I am excited to feel it!  Perhaps we will buy another electric one so that both my holes can be filled!

We also go to buy more hentai.  I am addicted and require more at all times.  I hope to find much in the way of lesbian action and direct insertion, for, often, they are dissappointing in that there is too much story.  There is simply something about animated sexual intercourse, so perfect, so clean, so much better than watching imperfect beings rub against each other with their fake breasts, strange hair formations, and moles of all shapes and sizes.  This is why I must have more to satisfy myself!  This is goal number seven, of course, and I will again indulge myself! 

My male is pleased by these current events and wishes also to purchase a video game, so that when we tire from the enjoyment we can rest and occupy ourselves.  I will probably play Kingdom Hearts II for I have yet to beat it and enjoy the story to its fullness.  It will be a fine day indeed.

I only hope that soon I find a female to enjoy these moments with us.  I become so saturated when I think of how much pleasure I already recieve from my male alone, and then when I think how much more I will recieve with an extra pair of hands, tongue, and perfect body are involved and available for touching and stroking and tasting.  It will be good.

I started my diet today, being that it was Easter yesterday and I had to endulge myself in some of the sweet delights purchased for me by my loving mother and a wonderful breakfast made by my goofy ol' dad.  My path is before me and very attainable.  My male is pleased.

I will be keeping mainly to things that have few calories but take a long time to eat.  For example, a large ceaser salad with just a bit of dressing has about 300 calories, but takes me an immense time to eat.  Another thing is Propel.  An entire bottle, depending on the size, has only 20-30 calories!  Soooo good!  Thinking of myself when this diet is over makes me very happy and also very horny.  I will be so good to look upon!  Oh, the joy!

I love diets!  They make me feel so pure and clean, which is completely untrue for me, but it is nice to pretend!  I enjoy that feeling where you have only eaten enough to sustain your basic processes and your stomach is rather empty.  I let's me know that I am doing well!  I missed it since last diet!

Overall, this is a good first day of questing and I am very pleased.

I have forgot that no one can read my mind and so no one knows what
all my goals are!  Let me list them for all those who are not
telepathic.

1.)  My current weight is 130 lbs. and I must reduce it to 110 for it to be acceptable.

2.)  The crowding in my teeth must be corrected.

3.)  The dry skin on my upper arm, while harmless, is slightly unattractive in the summer and must be dealt with.

4.)  I must revitalize my poor mental image of myself.

5.)  While I have already found the perfect male companion, I
must also find the perfect female companion who is pleasing in her
physical, mental and spiritual states within the state of Self, just
like my male.  This will be the hardest of the goals I have set
for myself.  How can one hope to find two soulmates in one
lifetime?  I will find out.

6.)  Once my body is correctly rearranged to my liking, I will
need a new set of clothing and jewelry to draw attention to my hard
work wherever I go.

7.)  At all times I require more pornography (especially
hentai) and video games for enjoyment purposes while I am not
studying.  These will need to be acquired.

8.)  I must work hard to attain more money, for while it does
not buy happiness, it does help to facilitate the coming about of it.

9.)  My dorm room is very drab and boring and decoration is in
order for next semester.  Joy in the home is most important!

10.)  I must begin saving money for the perfect home (complete
with DDR machine and hot tub) for myself, my male and my female.

These are my goals for the furtherment of my perfection.  They
will be attained, not necessarily in that order.  While I know
that number seven cannot ever be truly attained, I will work at all
times to obtain more of those things.  All progress will be posted
in this blog on the day that it occurs.