January 27, 2010
-
I can't sleep anymore. I've become some type of insomniac in that I lay down to sleep and can't seem to keep my mind from having conversations with me. I lay awake talking to myself about all kinds of things, imagining situations, pretending things happen, talking over the situations of the day and how they could have gone differently, and all the while squeezing my eyes shut hoping that eventually my internal conversations will instead translate into dreams.
I was physically in bed by about 3:30 AM this morning, but because my mind was stuck on analyzing Final Fantasy 8 and what I need to do to get ready for the oral qualifier in April I didn't actually fall asleep until around 8:30 AM. And I woke up about an hour and a half ago.
Something I can say for myself is that I am usually a "normal" sleeper. I go to bed and fall asleep in about half an hour. I sleep for approximately eight hours. I wake up groggy, but become energetic within an hour or two of awakening. However, while studying for the qualifying exam I had no schedule. Nothing was happening. I would wake up, start studying, continue studying, eat something, study a little more and then go to bed when I couldn't study anymore. By the end of the break, with no real commitments at any normal hours I was at the point where I was going to bed at 6 AM and waking up at 4 PM. Then, in the last few days, I've been trying desperately to get back to sleeping on a schedule compatible with the real world, especially since I've been feeling pretty ill on awakening and don't particularly like it. Unfortunately, probably based on the immediate sleep cycle change from 6 AM to 4 PM over to 2 AM to 10 AM, I now can't sleep at all.
I hope I don't start a Fight Club. Oh, I'm not supposed to talk about that.
Recent Comments